Thursday, March 11, 2010

Vegan "Humour" - British Style (hardy-har-har...)

The British tabloid The Sun published its "Top 10 Funny Vegan Jokes" (they inserted the word "funny," not me). A few of them are mildly amusing, although they all sound like the kind of jokes that a vegan version of Henny Youngman might tell on the rubber tofu "chicken" circuit.

Here they are:

Q: Why did the tofu cross the road?

A: To prove he wasn't chicken.

Q: How many vegans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Two, one to change it and one to check for animal ingredients.

Q: Why does vegan cheese taste bad?

A: It hasn't been tested on mice.

Q: What did one vegetarian spy say to the other vegetarian spy?

A: We have to stop meating like this

Q. What do you call a vegetarian who goes back to eating meat?

A. Someone who lost their veg-inity!

Q. What do you call a militant vegan?

A. Lactose intolerant.

Q: What do vegan zombies eat?

A: Graiinnnzzzz

Q: What's a vegan's favourite chat up line?

A: If I said you had the body of an all-natural, organic-living, animal-loving, environment-nurturing, whale-saving sex machine, would you hold it against me? Please?

Q: What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhoea?

A: A salad shooter.

Q: Why did the vegan cross the road?

A: Because she was protesting for the chicken, man!

1 comment:

  1. Why did the vegan cross the road? To cuddle the chicken when it was nearly hit by the KFC truck.